To bid or not to bid: Buying at auction with friends

It’s not uncommon for regular auction-goers to strike up friendships with other attendees. And oftentimes, groups of friends will plan an evening out to attend an auction together. It’s an enjoyable time and interesting to exchange opinions about an item’s worth when it’s up on the block.

But what happens when an item comes up at auction that both you and your friend would like to own?

I’ve seen friends outbid each other in a frenzy -- usually with boisterous laughter -- all in a sense of good, competitive fun.

But more often, I’ve noticed friends refrain from bidding at all once they’ve realized who they’re bidding against.

Here’s my approach: If I’ve invited someone to come along with me to the auction, I’ll back off and let them bid. Just being gracious. Since I attend frequently, it’s more likely that I’ll come across a similar bargain offered at another time. No point in driving the price up.

But if it’s someone I’m friendly with who regularly attends the auction I’m bidding against, every item is fair game.

I've occasionally had the experience of someone taking offense when I bid against them. I don’t understand that reaction. We’re all there to participate, and competitive bidding shouldn’t be taken personally. We all know the rules, and bidding is what we’re there to do. Whoever is willing to pay more, wins. If I’m not willing to pay as much, then that item is not so valuable to me... Let’s play!

Here’s another interesting observation about bidding: Couples can be entertaining to watch.

It works both ways, but more often, the husband is the bidder and the wife is the nudger. If he gets up to go to the bathroom or snack bar, she’ll bid on her own.. and with greater frequency! Husbands too. When the wife isn’t in the next seat to him, he’ll buy a lot more — usually for stuff that ends up in the garage. It’s funny; especially when the auctioneer makes public notice of it!